Fuck You Corn

So I pretty much got into a fight with my dinner.

I wish I was being funny.

Here's the recap I sent to Blake on Facebook:

That fucking corn.
Little bastard spilled himself on my shorts.
Wash the little bitch off.
I'm trying to stab that douche and no, he's gonna fucking bend.
Then he throws my fork on the floor. 
Too bad for him there was a clean one in the drawer.

Suffice to say I showed him who is fucking animate.

Okay, this is me making it a little bit funny.
I have to be funny publicly.

But the recap is pretty much correct.

Afterwards I coughed up a lung.

Now I'm nearly sure that my parents think I'm on drugs.